Do yourself a favor. Take both hands off the wheel and touch the stereo. Do you feel the power? Ah, yes friend, there's a lot of evil in the world. But there is also light, and I have been sent to shine a light on all degenerates, flanderers, liberals, and other evil doers, and expose them for what they really are. Don't waste your money on unnecessary and corrupting material possessions. Give. It. To. Me. There's only one thing that will save you; a highly fortified structure in the shape of the most powerful thing on the planet: ME! Degenerates will ruin this great city. In my wonderful book I tell of the impending disaster about to befall this planet. Nuclear holocaust, plagues of flying rodents, the seas rising up and turning yellow. It is coming. It is written by me! But you can save yourself. Contribute to the Pastor Richards Salvation Statue Fund. Pick up your telephone, call now: 1-8669-SAVE ME!

Evangelist

Condemning communists, liberals, and all the degenerates who dare not to donate to the Pastor Richards Salvation Statue Fund! Also, writing books, being holier-than-thou, and partying at my Hawaii mansion.